What's a BILF? Think of the term MILF. Replace the M with a B--the B standing for "Ballplayer", of course. ;)
This is primarily a Phillies blog, but since BILFiness knows very few team-related boundaries, expect plenty of banter about other hottie-laden teams (the Twins, Rangers, Yankees, and more!). The BILF Report is your snarky, tongue-in-cheek source for baseball facts and baseball fluff.
Utley's two homers off Sabathia last night were pretty hot, but Cliff Lee stole the show. A complete game (with 10 Ks and no walks), no earned runs for Lee, and a couple seriously amazing defensive plays...yeah, October magic is in the air, and Lee is at the center of it.
Now, I know it's just one game, so I'm not gonna get too excited yet. But the last 6 teams who have won the Fall Classic have also won that uber-important first game in the series. It was also important to beat the Yankees in game 1 in their ballpark, against their ace pitcher. It showed the Yankees and their fans/the media that have been looking down on the Phillies that this team is serious about winning. Again.
Not only do the Phillies start Game 1 of the World Series with their best pitcher, they also start it with their hottest pitcher. *swoon* Tonight's matchup (provided the rain doesn't prevent this game from actually happening): Lee vs Sabathia. Hmmm, I remember seeing Sabathia during last year's playoffs...Sabathia was a Brewer pitching against the Phils in the NLDS. He lasted a little over 2 innings pitching (granted, he was exhausted, but still), gave up a grand slam to the Flyin' Hawaiian, and allowed pitcher Brett Myers to terrorize him at bat. (Hey, is Myers on the roster for this series? Could he DH tonight--y'know, to bring back some fond memoris of last season?)
I've already painted my fingernails red (with glitter), am wearing red underwear, and will be wearing my new red feather boa tonight while I watch the game. Phillies pride, baby! I hope Game 1 is an unbeleevable game...
Cole Hamels (picture 5) looks like a freakin' GQ model. I swear I got weak in the knees when I saw that picture, and I was sitting down. The picture of the Madsons (picture 9) is so cute. Cliff Lee (picture 10) is total studliness when he's dressed up. But I've gotta say, as much as I love Jayson Werth's home runs lately, he looks like a total tool in picture 2.
Really, New York Post? Was this topic even article-worthy? That New Yorkers have been looking down on Philly for years? Well, duh. We already knew that. (By the way, it takes a special skill to make everyone you quote in an article sound like a jerk. Nice work.)
I'm hoping this article riles up the Phillies and their fans. I'm hoping the Phillies are ticked enough and good enough to beat the hell out of the Yankees. And if that happens, I already can't wait to see the Post's article about that. ;)
Game #1 of the World Series is Wednesday evening. Let's hope that Cliff Lee (#3 on that fearsome list) pitches in an appropriately ferocious and BILFalicious manner...
OK, so after being up 3-1 in the NLCS, I was fairly confident about the Phillies' chances of making it back to the Series. Still, though, I'm in a bit of a state of shock about how my boys are headed to the Fall Classic for the second consecutive year. Look, I've been a Phillies fan for 28 years now; this stuff's unheard of. I remember how often this team disappointed me when I was younger. They're more than making up for it in recent years, and I'm still adjusting to it.
These Phillies have stepped up their game in the postseason. They've wanted to win. The offense has shown up (holy 10-4 win tonight!). The bullpen's gotten less shaky. Several of our starters have absolutely dominated. They're playing as a team. Manuel's taking risks with the pitching staff, and it's paying off. They had a scary little slump toward the end of the season, but right now this team's en fuego, and I couldn't be more thrilled--or be more proud of them.
I'm glad to see some of the most important folks from the 2008 World Champions going back to the Series this year--Howard, Werth, Victorino, Lidge, Hamels, etc. But I'm really happy for some of the Phillies who weren't on that team. Like Raul Ibanez, who has been with this team for the entire 2009 season, playing his *** off, not having a World Series ring like the rest of the guys on the team have. Now he has his chance to earn one. Like Cliff Lee, who wouldn't have been anywhere near the postseason while he played with the Indians, but he's become the Phillies' ace pitcher. Like Pedro Martinez, who was the Mets' trash and our treasure--he wanted a major league club to play with this year, and now he just happens to have one that's on its way to the World Series. I'm happy for those new Philly team members who have been kickin' *** and takin' names ever since Philly acquired them. They've earned this chance.
During last night's game, the commentators kept mentioning how the Phillies have an American League offense. I certainly hope so, because the Yankees and the Angels are both very talented teams, and whichever team the Phillies will have to face will certainly be a challenge. We'll need every ounce of strength from our so-called American League offense...and every bit of strength from our pitchers, too.
That was completely unexpected. I've been a firm believer in keeping the phaith and all, but really, I thought we were doomed. Until J-Roll worked his magic. In the last out of the last inning of the game, naturally, since these Phillies games have really been nail-biters as of late.
It
was awesome to see such a massive pile of happy Phillies at the end of
tonight's game. I want to see more of those...and soon. :)
I'm
still kinda speechless. I should have known better, though. Anything
can happen in October baseball...there's magic in the air.
And, obviously, tonight there was magic landing in right-center field. Love it!
So Friday night, I was incredibly angry, as I'm sure most other Philly fans were. I called my mother right after the game--I didn't even bother saying hello, and just started in with ***** our bullpen! ***** Chase Utley!" (And no, I did not mean in the good/fun way, either.) But what I was really thinking--and forgot to say--was ***** our entire offense, too." (Also not in the good way.)
Yeah, the bullpen was screwy in the eighth inning of Friday's NLCS game against the Dodgers. And yeah, Utley should have not made that screwy throw (anyone else wondering if this is a sign that Chuttles is hurt?). But neither one of those things would have mattered so much if we'd had more than a 1-run lead against LA. Hello, offense? Were you guys napping? (Not you, Ryan Howard. You're awesome.)
I was in quite a crappy mood on Friday evening. But luckily the Phillies' offense redeemed themselves in Game 3 of the NLCS with an 11-0 blowout, along with the fabulous (phabulous!) Cliff Lee. 10 strikeouts, no walks, 3 hits...and he got a hit himself? And managed to look really good while doing all of this? I'm in love. Or lust. Or something. (I noticed he looked cold; I wish MLB would offer a job where you could apply to be the official hand-blower for pretty pitchers during the playoffs. Cliff Lee had to keep blowing on his hands because it was so damn cold; why waste the pitcher's energy doing that when there are girls like me willing to help him out with that? Haha.)
Tonight it's Game 4 of the NLCS. My parents are there (soooooo jealous, Mom and Dad!). Hopefully the offense will show up again, too. No need for an 11-0 trouncing tonight (although hey, if they've got it in 'em, then why the hell not?)--just a win will suffice. :)
Also: Saw Chad Billingsley (whom I call Chad BILFingsley) pitch last night...he pitched better than most of the other Dodger pitchers (for a while, anyway), but what is up with that playoff goatee he's got goin' on there? Ugh!
And finally, if you've not already done so, the BILFalicious Joe Mauer (swoon!) is up for the Clutch Performer of the Year Award. Click here to vote for him!
Another game, another nail-biter for the Phils. (And another win too, thankfully!) Do the Phillies realize that if they give all their fans heart attacks from making them sit through games like these, nobody's going to be alive to purchase any of their spiffy playoff merchandise?
Hamels pitched well...sometimes. (Although goddamn, he looked hot the whole time.) Note that I do not think giving up a 2-run homer to Manny qualifies as "pitching well." Madson was worse. And Lidge scared the hell out of me because the first runner he faced got on base. I was like, "Here we go again; he's gonna blow it!" But he didn't. And so the Phillies won it, 8-6.
The Phils' bats were on phire...most of 'em, anyway. Utley was an 0-fer, I think (at least, he was 0-3 last I looked at the TV last night; if he had another at-bat, I don't remember it). But Rauuuuuul, Chooch, and R-Ho got it done. The look on Kershaw's face when Ruiz hit the 3-run homer was priceless.
I mentioned in this post the other day about wearing a lucky item of clothing throughout each playoff game. I'm changing up that commandment a little bit. I wanted to do something that was some sort of constant...but I couldn't decide what that thing should be. Red stilettos? Red bracelet? Favorite necklace with the glittery red lips? Red nail polish? None of those seemed quite right. But I finally came up with a constant that does feel right. Right after every playoff game, win or lose, I'm gonna call the biggest Phillies fans I know: my parents. Whether I call 'em up hooting and hollering and ringing my red cowbell, or I call them up swearing about the game, Philly baseball is love...and I'm gonna share that love with the folks I love most. Mom and Dad, you've been warned! :)
Holy crap. I cannot remember ever watching such an intense, nail-biting, face-hiding game. There were moments when I could barely breathe. And where my heart was pounding so hard I thought it was gonna come flying out of my chest.
That was truly a hell of a game. There were some crazy plays (Ben Francisco's amazing catch in left field and Dexter Fowler's insane jump over Chase Utley on his way to second, just to name a few). There was some great pitching--Lee was excellent again. I wished we could have gotten another complete game outta him, but Manuel did the right thing by relying on Madson, Eyre, and Lidge to help out.
But the most impressive thing, I think, was that the Phillies did something we've rarely seen out of them this season--they made a truly amazing comeback. Admittedly, I'd been really worried. They'd had bases loaded twice and had squandered the opportunities. They had a couple fielding errors. They were not entirely playing at their best. But once that awful eighth inning happened, when the score changed from 2-1 Phillies to 4-2 Rockies, these Phillies were not content to let that happen, to go to a game 5, to give up their momentum. So they went and got back that momentum. In the ninth inning, Victorino, Utley, Howard, Werth...they ganged up on Street and they took back their lead. And then Lidge and Eyre helped them keep that lead. This is the kind of teamwork, the kind of rally, that makes them the Fightin' Phils. And this is exactly the sort of thing we want to see out of them as they prepare to face their 2008 NLCS foe, the Los Angeles Dodgers, once again.
A few BILF-related tidbits: Cliff Lee had gotten his hair cut and had shaved his face since NLDS Game 1 (when I saw him, he was kinda scruffy). GodDAMN, he looked good tonight, and I couldn't help but think (many times) how it would be a lot of fun to just give him, you know, a friendly couple of nibbles on his pretty neck. Huston Street also looked great (especially, but not limited to, when he was helping to ensure a Phillies win), and I'd be more than happy to go console him after that tough, tough loss tonight.
I'm already looking forward to seing the Phillies in the NLCS. That being said, I'm grateful to have 2 days where I don't have to watch a baseball game (the NLCS begins Thursday) so that I can actually get something productive done...screaming/swearing at the TV does not count as "productive." ;)
And on a final note--it's nice to see that we've finally repaid the Rockies for kickin' our butts in the 1997 NLDS. Yay!
This means you don't ever use things like "When we" or "When my team" and "win(s) the World Series" in the same sentence. Except in that sentence, of course, which was for demonstration purposes only.
9. Thou shalt keep wearing that "lucky" playoff article of clothing until your team is done in the playoffs.
Yes, even if it stinks or is dirty. Same deal for (ew!) playoff beards. You wear it 'til they win or they're eliminated. And if nobody else wants to be around you in the meantime, that isn't necessarily a bad thing.
8. Thou shalt make amorous comments about favorite-team BILFs who do good things.
In this case, it's totally OK to be lustful. If Ryan Howard drives in a run, that makes him even hotter than he was five minutes ago, when he wasn't driving in a run. It's OK--encouraged, actually--to then send text messages to your friends announcing that you'd like to bang the hell out of R-Ho. He's earned it.
7. Thou shalt not feel guilty about scaring people with playoff-related screaming.
You've gotta cheer on your team. Loudly. Unless the cats are hiding under the bed, your children are crying, and your neighbors are descending upon your front door with torches in hand, you're really just not being enthusiastic enough.
6. Thou shalt not throw things at the televsion during the game.
Remember, you'll need that TV in case your team advances to the next round of playoffs. Breaking the TV is not an option. Not even if Lidge is pitching in a really frightening way.
5. Thou shalt not care that October will be a completely unproductive month.
Productivity? That's what November's for. You know, while football's on.
4. Thou shalt not taunt fans of losing teams.
This is especially true if said fans are exes, ex-hookups, or any other kind of ex-anything. And even more true if it's your team that beat their team. This is one facet of...
3. Thou shalt not breed bad baseball karma.
Be nice to everyone. Don't be an ******* fan. Don't be an ******* in general. Don't mock people whose teams are not as talented as yours. The Baseball Gods are watching...
2. Thou shalt not covet thy opposing-team BILFS.
For example, it's totally OK to make comments about how you'd really, really like to make out with Huston Street, but only after he's done allowing your Phillies to beat the Rockies and advance in the playoffs. Opposing-team BILFs must be seen as SCUM and POOP until your team beats them, even if they really are totally hot. Loyalty to your own team (and its BILFs), and all that.
1. Thou shalt never stop believing.
This one's the hardest one to do. You've gotta keep the faith, keep cheering hard, and believe in your team even when the outcome seems near-hopeless. After all, someone's gotta win the Series...and if your team's in the playoffs, they've at least got a shot. So believe in 'em, dammit!
Utley's two homers off Sabathia last night were pretty hot, but Cliff Lee stole the show. A complete game (with 10 Ks and no walks), no earned runs for Lee, and a couple seriously amazing defensive plays...yeah, October magic is in the air, and Lee is at the center of it.
